Ol’ Dutch is a peruser of the online “for sale ads” on Craigslist. Craig, who is actually a friend of Miss Trixie, started his site to mimic the old classifieds in newspapers.

And, now its popularity has killed the newspaper classifieds and given rise to competing platforms like Facebook online garage sales and such. And, as we all know, an online garage sale, just like the old fashion one you had in your actual garage, carport of shed, is where people put items up for sale that they could not live without just two weeks ago.

It is a good method to dispose of things you grew tired of or don’t really need anymore and also a great place to sell an ex-spouse’s items after they commit some crime of gross magnitude.

I always hear about some wife selling her man’s tools, toys, hunting/fishing gear or car cheap online so am constantly on the lookout for heartbreak hotel on those sites.

While you wait for poor lonely heart to sell her cheating husband’s stuff, you can also find a plethora of “rare” or “one of a kind” items listed. Now these may be some form of limited production memorabilia or another but usually just a junk car or old DVD that someone wants to jack the price on.

Last week I saw a “rare” 1969 boat for sale for some astronomical price. I proceeded to conduct extensive research and found the truth: it was just an old boat with good marketing.

Now, anyone in the business will tell you that selling involves good presentation, but, more often than not, “good presentation” is just another way of lying.

No realtor worth their salt will advertise an old house for sale without adding the prerequisite words “quaint,” “Victorian,” “historic,” and the ever inviting “rustic.”  

Matter of fact there are even websites like wordstouse.com where a person can get hundreds of descriptive words and phrases that will help sell just about anything you have.

The term “fixer upper” gets used a lot here in Colorful Colorado and often is attached to an advertisement for a house resembling a sheep shed and smelling of the same.

This whole phenomena really came to light when Ol’ Dutch was trying to sell an old double wide mobile home in Texas. I had listed it as “uninhabitable” but the people who called about it were so used to positive ads about trashy places they just could not grasp someone being honest about it. I sold it to a guy who remodeled it and he sold it for a nice profit using words like, “recently remodeled” and “roomy.”

Nowadays, the word to attach to anything you are selling is “rare.” If I personally had something that other people would count as “rare” and “valuable,” it seems to me if that I might just need to keep it.

Which brings to mind something concerning this term “rare.” Last month, someone referred to Ol’ Dutch as a “rare breed” and I took that as an extreme compliment although Miss Trixie rolled her eyes and fell on the floor laughing at my take on the phrase.

About a thousand years ago, Jimmy Stewart and Maureen O’Hara starred in a movie loosely based on the true story of Charlie Goodnight and Hereford cattle.

Being a fan of Jimmy Stewart, I took someone calling me a “rare breed” a compliment. Miss Trixie informed me quite promptly that “rare breed” referred to the animal in the equation and not the usual type of bull I dish out. But, at least I dish it with some flair.

Kevin Kirkpatrick and his Yorkie, Cooper, fish, hunt, ATV or hike daily. His email is [email protected]. Additional news can be found at www.troutrepublic.com or on Twitter at TroutRepublic.